Kitten a Go-Go

Karma is a bitch

During the winter, I'm a smug desert dweller and I say things like, oh, it's 70 here and perfect.  The breeze is just right.  Oh, sorry to hear it is snowing there...

Today, karma slapped me with a fierce red leather glove and said, screw you, it's going to be 106 degrees today.  And I was all, but, please, it's not even June  -  My ass is going to melt.  Karma, being like that, looked at me with a head tilt and said, yeah, your ass could use a little melting. 

Does anyone need a foreign exchange lawyer in San Diego through September?

I spy with my little eye...

I saw the following things during my day...

1. A $300 Million casino on fire.  From the windows in my office. 
2. A bumper sticker on a minivan that said "I love Clay Aiken."
3. A billboard that had a giant green neon green toilet that, as I approached, turn into a margarita

An Evening at the Theater

Last night was a picnic for work.  Picnic festivities, then a play at an outdoor theater  somewhere in Red Rock Canyon. 

I put on some color.  I put on some make up.  Hell, I even styled my hair to the point where the ever-present horn did not appear.  I mean, I was ready for some summer theater fun. 

We left around 6:15.  Since we've been to Red Rock Canyon before, I figured it wouldn't take more than 45 minutes.  I checked Mapquest before we left to find the easiest way to get there from Henderson.  (We've always come from the other side during previous trips.)  The directions looked easy enough.  Go on three roads on which we've traveled before and then make one turn.  Okay.

We took Kevin's car.  The sun was blinding us.  It seemed like we'd been on the road for too long.  Kevin suggested that we were lost.  I had faith in Mapquest and said, but no, we stay on this road until we turn left onto this other road.

Eventually, I said something that it had never taken this long to get to Red Rock Canyon before, so there was no way that it took this long to get to the other place. 

As one point, my phone beeped and I got a voice mail.  It let me check the voice mail, but it wouldn't put a call through to anything else. 

Most of this was uphill.  Kevin's car was struggling.  We weren't doing great with gas.  For understandable reasons, he didn't want to turn around until we got to a gas station and we could fill the tank.  I agreed with this rationale - since we couldn't make an outgoing call, i slowly convinced myself that we were going to break down and be killed by highway pirates.

After some more driving, we saw a sign that said welcome to Nye county.  Okay.  The town of Pahrump was next.  We drove through enough to find a gas station.  On the way, there was a billboard advertising the brothel museum.  In hindsight, we totally should have stopped to check that out.  We filled up with gas and turned around.  Since the play had already started at that point, there was no way in hell. 

The drive home was a little scary because there are few cars and lots of nothing as far as the eye can see.  After some more driving through the middle of nowhere, we saw the entire valley and that stupid Stratosphere.  That was a relief.  Since we hadn't eaten dinner, I told Kevin that I would take him out. 

We ended up at Lotus of Siam and had tasty thai food. 

So, yeah, what was supposed to be a work outing and summer theater good time, turned into a scary drive through the middle of nowhere and I'm sure years worth of material for my coworkers.  That's fine.  I wasn't killed by highway pirates, so it's okay.

Once a year, Stef takes me out and tries to kill me

[I met Stef last summer, so this is only the second time it has happened, but I feel certain she will try again next year.  Her ritual started at the Stratosphere last year.]

This year, it started with a simple text message when I was in the car on my way to the Grand Canyon.  It was an offer to go to Desperado.  I accepted because I am a moron and am always much braver in theory than in reality. 

When we got to the Dr. Chef's house, he informed us that the Desperado didn't open until noon.  Since it was far earlier than that, I enthusiastically voted to go on Speed at the Sahara. 

This ride was AWESOME.  This is almost my favorite kind of roller coaster.  It goes super fast in a very short period of time.  It goes upside down and is too fast and traumatic to truly allow my fear to reach the appropriate threshold.  The whole ride was incredibly quick, but it rocked my world. 

After that, we went to the Desperado at Buffalo Bill's in Primm.  Primm is a town in the middle of nowhere and there are casinos and outlets.  One of the casinos has the scariest roller coaster on earth.  Upon viewing it, I realized that my agreement to ride it was premature.  I immediately began formulating how to get out of the situation.  It turns out that I couldn't get out of it and I rode the thing.  Let me walk you through how that went.

You start out and you are climbing this insanely large hill.  Then, after sixteen years are shaved from your life from the sheer anxiety that the climb will eventually end in your death, you plumet 225 feet and then you are whipped through some more crazy shit.   After your heart stops racing, the g.d. thing starts bunny hops.  Evil, malicious rabbits of death would be a more appropriate name than bunny hop.  When I am hovering above the earth in a little tiny fast moving cart, I like to be firmly attached to the cart with crazy bondage devices.  I DO NOT LIKE when my ass comes off the seat and I feel like I am going to fly.  NOT COOL.  And of course that's what happened.  Shortly after that, it seemed like a great time for the ride to end. 

Dear readers, you are smart.  You know that's not what happened.  Next thing I know, the devil cart goes inside some faux mountain and we begin the spiral ascent to another near death experience.  Finally, after some more crap, we were released. 

In another couple of weeks, I will probably say that it was awesome and I will totally do it again. 

Look, It's Lush and Green!!!

Do you all see the green mountain scape through which Kevin is walking?  (Pay no mind to the overexposed flowers.)  That's less than an hour from my house.  Seriously.

We took a field trip to Mount Charleston this afternoon.  The ride up the mountain (more than 4,000 feet in 20 miles) involved a lot of gum and no radio reception (we were in Kevin's car which does not know the joys of XM).  We walked like 30 miles up a super steep hill to see a small waterfall.  I loved the waterfall because it must be 70 degrees where the waterfall lives.  Awesome. 

Then, we had sugar snacks at the lodge.  That's right, dear readers.  There's a lodge.

Then, we left.  From the top of the mountain, all the way until we got to the highway, Kevin had the car in neutral.  We even passed a person and exceeded the posted speed limit in this condition.  That seems noteworthy.

I love Mount Charleston.  I cannot wait to go back there.  Until there is snow.  Then I want nothing to do with it.

Where to Start...

I am so thankful that we were at a red light when we saw this one. Yeah, that's a NUN on a billboard for a law office.
Originally uploaded by kittenagogo.

If you can't see this clearly, you need to click on the picture so that you are fully prepared to discuss the professional responsibility aspects of this billboard.

That's right -it's a nun. The caption reads "Even I got one!" I called the number. It is definitely a law office. This may be the best billboard I have ever seen for legal services.